Before What are the most common situations for the first time the marriage contract marriage?
A: There are two types of marriage contracts or prenups:
One is where the groom or the bride part of a family as big as a real estate empire. Here is the marriage contract is for the family inherits a non-blood relatives as a partner through death or divorce to protect the settlements.
A second situation occurs when the wife or husband a considerable fortune, has a far more profitableCareer and not his partner.
Second is not just romantic?
A: Absolutely. It's nothing less romantic than sitting in a room with two lawyers at a conference table to discuss what happens when you have things a divorce or her death. You must consider all possible outcomes horrible. It 's all colors, kills the romance and can put a sudden end to the period of courtship.
But it's not romantic when you try to change dirty diapers dueleaked around the crib sheet. Not everything that is romantic in marriage.
Third sees a trend where more people looking especially first marriages are prenups?
R. Yes I think to marry a sea change that occurs, especially in large cities, where people have to wait longer - the average age is 30-34 years. She has more to lose, plus they have seen what can go wrong. So I am better informed decisions and take a pragmatic approachMarriage. With a prenuptial agreement is an essential part of it. A woman who is college, with an income exceeding $ 50,000, is about to marry over the age of 25 years and has no children, when married, is much less likely to divorce. For example, this tendency to a lower divorce rate for the State of New York and New York led the national average.
Fourth whole situation seems like a marriage contract recipe for disaster. something good can come out of this?
A: Absolutely. You learn a lot aboutyou and your partner: over the fears and insecurities and the trends too greedy, pushy or submissive behaviors. You can learn that you can not really right for each other and save you a lot of trouble in the future. Or you can learn right you really are for each other - can work together as one, even in a very difficult situation.
The marriage contract means that lovey dovey couples will go from fantasy to deal with real life: the possibility of betrayal, loss and alsoDeath. But this can be a positive experience. When you face loss, love can flourish. A prenuptial agreement signed means that both acknowledge they may lose another. If you understand that you value the relationship more, tend to work on it. It is less likely to keep it for granted.
The marriage contract also provides, your partner, as a separate person with different experiences and needs. He must be able to see it their way, and must be able to view ithis way - with empathy and compassion. Then you can meet in the middle. Negotiating Group to learn the strength of the marriage partners to resolve conflicts. And these are critical to creating win-win solutions in marriage, key fundamental enough to love.
When the fifth in a committed relationship should be the subject?
A. The marriage contract must be brought as soon as possible. Ideally, before the marriage proposal in the context of a discussion of what each person sees what he wantsand the need to get happily married.
It should not be in partner countries face, "a paper that is a mere formality" which should be signed, will be thrown in the last minute, when the invitations are already out and the pressure to go ahead with the wedding. Ideally, the discussion should be their marriage contract if the proposal in the air as possible, or immediately after it occurs.
Sixth What technology do you recommend for the beginning of the debate?
R. It 'verypowerful technique to use in this dangerous situation that I call 10 minutes listening session. It is here that a partner "therapists" and are playing a 10 minute session the other partner if he simply listens empathically, fears, thoughts, desires and needs of marriage, including issues concerning the marriage contract. Then the partners can be reversed. You can do this as often as necessary.
The couple must share a couple of pre-marital counseling theirDesires, needs and desires in marriage. This is a good place to neutral air disturbances and disagreements over the prenuptial agreement and work to a win-win solution.
Seventh What about lawyers and the entire judicial process?
A. Both parties have legal representation, so that an agreement which 'fall hard. Everyone should also pro-marriage advocate, believes that a win-win negotiations is the objective. In a marriage contract, both parties must disclose their assets. OtherwiseConsent agreement, and you have all the facts. The marriage contract covers generally after the children, death, life, adultery, divorce. The timing of these events is to examine, that is, the longer the marriage lasts, the more money in the transaction.
A marriage contract can work for a fine win for both members of couples where both realized that their needs will be made in case of divorce or death to win.
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